Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
