You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You ate ashes out of my bong
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
