So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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