He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
