OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
