the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
