When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
