He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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