p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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