He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
