he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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