"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just cropdusted the office
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
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