Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
