he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
