More tranny stories later!
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
