no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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