We're facebook friends in real life
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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