I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
