My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
