i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
