the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize