he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
