I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize