just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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