Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I touched a dick in church today
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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