If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize