It was confusing and full of hummus
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
