You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
