Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
