So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
high people should be assigned attendants
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
