Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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