If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Everyone says I win the strip club
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
