After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
