love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
