I wish i was in the wii world.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize