their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
