Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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