How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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