You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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