Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
