Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
