So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
