I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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