We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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