I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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