did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Just cropdusted the office
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
There r osticjed everywhere
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
