That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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