I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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