I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
