I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
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