That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
