ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
