Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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